Wednesday, March 25, 2015

A Terrible Journey

Saturday began as any normal day until late evening when my mom took my temperature. I had a fever of 102 but I didn't feel any different than I had earlier except that my head was warmer. But of course my mom had to call the doctor because my temp was above 100. While my mom waited for the on call doctor to return my mom's call, we took my temperature again and it had dropped to 101.7. But when the doctor called back she said she wanted us to go to the ER for antibiotics. So I spent my first night in an ER and I don't plan to again anytime soon.

Sunday morning when mom and I got home, I slept all day and I really haven't stopped yet.

Around 1pm on Monday I got called into the hospital for more antibiotics. It was a quick and easy trip that was pointless to me.

Around 2pm yesterday, my mom got a call from my doctor about bacteria growing in one of my blood cultures from the day before. So I had to make another trip to Hershey. But there were no open beds up on the floor so I spent another 5 hours in the ER, again not by choice.

Today I was supposed to come into the clinic for labs and then get a PET scan later this afternoon. Well, I'm not going to the clinic, but the doctors are trying their best to sneak around the rules so that I can have my PET scan.

In other words the start to my week has been a nightmare and it's not even close to being over.

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Chemo Sucks!

To start off, I'd like to say I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy, not that I have an enemies. Yesterday I had regular chemo, but I felt far from normal. The off feeling actually started Tuesday, I spent the day sleeping on and off, and alternating between sweating uncontrollably and huddling under 50 soft blankets. I just couldn't get comfortable. Yesterday I still wasn't up to par and the nausea that chemo can cause made it even worse. My mom told me I looked pale and green. My one nurse commented on how I lost all the color in my face. And my other nurse, my favorite one, felt terrible because she had just unhooked my port so she couldn't give me any anti-nausea meds through the iv. Today I'm feeling a little better, still nauseous, but less flu-like. But I haven't really eaten anything in the past 24 hours, just keeping up with my fluids.

Today I've decided to continue working on my writing. I'm planning on starting a new novel and possibly finishing the one I started almost a year and a half ago, the week Frozen first came out in theaters. 

This week I learned I have to drop Global Studies and bio this year because I'm to far behind. My two least favorite classes, I don't want to take them again. Now I'm thinking about where I'll be next year with school. I have terrible anxiety about school and people, especially new people. So I'm a little worried.

Yesterday wasn't all bad though. I got a surprise visit from two Thon students from Penn State, Kyle and Evan, during chemo. At first I was reluctant to meet them because I don't like new people. But my mom didn't listen to me and invited them in. We got along very well because we were able to talk about the upcoming March Madness stuff and we compared our brackets. It was nice to have a distraction while I was feeling bad.

Today's question: What is your biggest goal?

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Don't Worry! I'm alive

Hi everyone. I'm sorry I haven't blogged in the last week as I have been in pain and sleeping many hours of the day. We have a lot to catch up on, so let's begin.

Last week I started having excruciating pain in my left calf, only my left one. I couldn't walk without wincing in pain. The doctors were confused as to why only one leg was bothering me because if the chemo was causing the pain it should have effected both legs. This left the doctors thinking I may have a blood clot somewhere in my body. I was showing all the symptoms so the doctor ordered an ultrasound of my leg. When nothing showed up, and I was still having pain come Friday they had me come back to the hospital for a lung CT scan. Again nothing was found, so just to be safe the doctors again looked at my legs and decided to put me on blood thinner shots twice a day. These shots are given by none other than my wonderful mom. I might add that these shots really burn. No wonder my mom insisted on giving me the shots.

As many of you know Southern Pennsylvania was hit with a heavy amount of snow Wednesday into Thursday. Lucky me, I had Rituxan on Wednesday and chemo on Thursday. There was no room at the inn, also know as the Ronald McDonald House, so me and mom spent the night at a Best Western. For dinner Wednesday night, Mom and I joined my Godmother at the Soda Jerk, a 50's style diner. We went back to the hotel room to chat and hangout and I was asleep in ten minutes, just before 8pm. The next morning, after my long slumber, there was a free continental breakfast. It was a good thing it was free because I would not have paid any amount of money to eat in that sauna.

Friday night I got to watch myself as the star of my cousin's video documentary. The spotlight was on me, and for once I didn't mind the attention. I'd say Kimberlyn did a pretty good job with what she was given.

Saturday morning, I left my house for awhile and ventured to the outside world full of cranky parents, crying babies, children who ask for everything in sight and teenagers wearing more makeup than a clown, also known as the store. The store, to be specific, was BAM, Books A Million. I needed to buy a book for my friend, Ms. Little House on the Prairie. 
After my adventure, I ducked back into my safe world by going to Ms. Cathi's house. She used to be my sister preschool teacher. I hadn't seen them since the night before Ms. Cathi's daughter's, also one of my best friends, homecoming. We ran into their family at the mall. The last time I was at their house was my second day of school when we picked up my sister. It was great to see their whole family again. It brightened my day. 

On Sunday, Ms. Little House and watched the end of She's the Man and Step Up Revolution. During Step Up Revolution, Ms. Little House's mom, my favorite youth group chaperone, was kind enough to come over and shave my mom's head. I think it looks good, just different. It will take time to get used to it, just like with my head. 

Yesterday I started binge watching Finding Carter on On Demand. It's a show about how a girl was abducted at age 3 and the woman who abducted her raised her as her own. Now Carter is back with her real family and is butting heads with her mother, finding new friends at her new school and doing a good job of being the rebellious twin. Yes, she has a twin sister named Taylor. Does anyone else watch this show? Or any other shows you think I might like on Netflix?
While I was having my tutoring session yesterday, my little brother, who is not so little anymore, was getting his head shaved. At first, he didn't take off his hood because he looked different. But when he finally let my mom take a picture this morning, I was proud to call him my brother.

That brings us to today.The last day of Rituxan! I should be really happy, but all my aches and pains and everything about Mortimer Dorkus makes it hard to celebrate or be happy about anything.

Thank you to all of you, for your support and just for reading my blog.

Feel free to comment.

Sunday, March 1, 2015

I'm Famous

So as many of you know, I got my head shaved on Wednesday around 9:45pm by a good friend of ours. But before my head was shaved, I got to shave the guy's head first. He thought it was only fair if I shaved his head before he shaved my head. I actually did a really good job, not to mention the fact that it was fun.

I think I'm falling in love with... Shamrock Shakes. I've had four in the past 48 hours. 

I shaved another person's head on Friday. He actually isn't just a person, he's a great friend who we'll call Shamrock Bringer. I started by giving him a Mohawk, then a comb over and finally I shaved it all off. I seriously have the most amazing friends ever.

Then last night Shamrock Bringer and Nike King came over to my house. They brought cupcakes and pizza, none of which we needed because our house is filled with desserts and we had just ordered pizza for dinner.

To top of the week, my sister's godmother and her daughter, one of my really good friends visited us from Wisconsin. We hadn't seen her in four years. So my sister got a bunch of presents to make up for the many missed birthdays. 

This week I also got be a star in a short film for my oldest cousin on my mom's side of the family. She is taking a film class and must shoot a film on an experiment, so what is a better experiment than a cousin with Mortimer Dorkus.

Today my ultimate best friend Burger King came over to visit me. She is actually right here as I type. I have tried to shave her head multiple times today. And I have told her I love her multiple times today because I am an emotional basket case whose been run over by a truck, metaphorically of course. I just feel so attached to my friends and family at this point. I can't control it at all. It's kind of scary because I actually feel like care about him. Last year, as punishment mom made us sit on the catch together and hold hands and cried about it because I didn't want to go anywhere near him and now I am hugging for no apparent reason. I'd say I'm emotional wreck, putting it nicely.