Chemo Fun

This morning I endured a hour long car ride through the countryside. It's a good thing I was half asleep or we would have needed a barf bucket. We didn't arrive until almost 9am, which set us back. And to top it off, my room got changed. Instead of room 25 like usual I'm in room 15.

I always tired and sore. This isn't supposed to happen until you're old and gray like my mom. '

Enough about my mom. Today I'm going to talk about my siblings. I have a little sister and a younger brother. My sister and I are adjoined at the hip. My brother and I, not so much. My brother refused to talk to me, or even look at me the week after I told him about my diagnosis. My sister on the other hand treats me the same. If I ask her for help she'll try and barter with me. For instance, the other day I asked her to get me a cup of water. She said only if I turned on a song for her on TV. I was very tired and thirsty so I agreed. But my sister is so sweet. She does kid writing for school and the topic was how can you follow in Jesus' footsteps. She said she follows in his footsteps by helping my big sister because she's sick. And she drew a picture of me laying down with my head on sideways.

I miss being able to just hang out with my friends whenever I want, even if they have a cold. I miss playing Just Dance until midnight. I miss not being the center of attention. I miss my best friends. I miss arguing with my brother. I miss my mom and my little sister anytime they leave. My emotions have been seriously messed up and I've become extremely attached to my mom and sister. I miss not having a care in the world. But what I really miss is feeling like myself.

I'm literally holding my eyelids up to stay awake at this point. So the last thing i have to say is, everyday you achieve something, it may not be something huge that everybody notices, but just by getting through another day you have achieved something great.

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