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Showing posts from January, 2015

A Cry A Day

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This post is going to be shorter than my other ones.

Today I was on Instagram, a social media site used to post pictures, when I saw I had a post from someone. A good friend from my old school had sent a picture and a sweet message to me saying he was thinking about me and praying for me. I have known him since kindergarten and we used to be locker buddies. The picture and post made me cry, tears of joy. But it's nice to know that so many people care about me and are here for me. I've found that during these times you find out who your true friends are and I think I have some pretty great ones.

I really appreciate all the prayers from everyone.

Today I also found out that I am having a pulmonary function test before my biopsy and port procedures tomorrow. It is going to be a long, long day.

Remember, feel free to comment.

Still Scan Day

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So I was supposed to have a PET scan today. Well that didn't go exactly as planned. I was all set up with an IV and I had already drank the oral contrast. I even endured an hour in a freezing cold room and was forced to watch Property Brothers with my dad. Then I was put on the scanning table and the contrast dye was put in my IV. The only problem was I am terrified of closed spaces! I started moving into the machine for the scan. Then they pulled me back out and repeated that a few times. But right before I was ready to go back in the machine, like way back, I had a panic attack. I started crying and shaking. The technician brought my parents in and discussed the different options. I could either finish the scan today, which was not happening, they could reschedule and give me medicine to calm and relax me, or they could do it under general anesthesia. I am all for the general anesthesia, but the doctors would rather not do that. So on Monday morning I am having the PET scan but …

Scan Day

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I figured now was as good as anytime to tell you the type of Hodgkin's lymphoma. I have NLPHL, a rare form that is most commonly found in 30-40 year old men. Yeah! when I do it, I do it. Only about 5% of people who are diagnosed with Hodgkin's have this type. There is a difference in the size and characteristics of the cells involved. In NLPHL, the cells resemble popcorn but classical Hodgkin's does not. Even though it's a rare type, it's still very curable.

Later today I'm going to have my first PET Scan. I'm a little nervous because as I said in my last post I am terrified of tight spaces. I'm also grumpy because I won't be eating until at least 3:30 this afternoon. I mean I've been on a no-carb diet for almost four days and now I can't anything. It really sucks! This morning I woke up to this wonderful aroma from the kitchen. I'm not sure what it was, but it smelled beautiful. The worst part was when I got downstairs my dad asked if I …

Another Day Another Thing Conquered

Yesterday I decided that I really hate the word cancer. Like I really really hate it. The feelings it brings with it are not pleasant by any means. But a good friend told me that I have to give it a name. Not just any name, an ugly name. I scrolled through lists on he Internet to find names. Some were pretty funny, others I never thought of being ugly names and some were names of my friends. The comments under the names were even funnier than the names themselves. But in the end I decided to give it a first and a last name, both equally ugly. I named it Mortimer Dorkus. Sorry to anyone who might be cursed with either name.

This morning I started a no carbohydrate diet. Trust me, it was not my idea because everything has carbs. I have to start this diet for the next few days because I'm getting a PET Scan on Wednesday. A PET scan is done to see if Mortimer Dorkus has spread anywhere else in my body. They inject a tracer of glucose into me. The reason I can't eat carbs is because…

Mortimer Dorkus Has Been Awoken

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Earlier this week my life changed in an instant. I was diagnosed with Hodgkin's lymphoma, a curable cancer in the lymphatic system. To say this was a shock is a huge understatement. At first I didn't know what to say or do, it may have been the first time I was ever speechless. But now I've sort of been in denial, like if I don't say it, it's not happening. And when I do tell people, I don't feel any connection to the words. I'm just going through the motions. People ask me what they can do and I don't know how to answer because it just doesn't feel real.

My biggest fear was how I would tell my friends and that they'd suddenly treat me differently. But I learned that you just have to come out and say it. I texted my best friend to see if we could talk, sooner rather than later. At that point, I'm pretty sure a million different scenarios went though her head, none of them what really happened. She replied asking why I couldn't just text …